


Home for the Holidays

by Battythebat



Category: Dragon Age (Video Games), Dragon Age - All Media Types, Dragon Age: Inquisition
Genre: Alternate Universe - Modern Setting, F/M, Mountie verse, Mountie!Cullen
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2017-12-26
Updated: 2017-12-31
Packaged: 2019-02-21 22:22:57
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 2
Words: 2,885
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/13153242
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Battythebat/pseuds/Battythebat
Summary: Cullen had promised Mia that he wouldn't let work get in the way of this year's Satinalia festivities. He tries to keep his promises, but sometimes it feels like the Maker, his Bride, and the universe are out to test him.Faced with a growing pile of paperwork and an unexpected plus one, Cullen just needs to survive the holidays with his family. And also keep his family at a safe distance from his guest who happens to be an assassin.The next 72 hours are going to feel like an Age.





	1. Satinalia Eve (part i)

Cullen tries to remember for the twentieth time in the past hour that Raleigh wasn’t always such a coldhearted brute. There had been a time when they first worked together that they were a synchronized team, firing off ideas and thoughts alike and getting the job done but also with a human touch; after a number of hard hitting cases, there were fewer instances where they comforted the victim and their families, and more tough pills to swallow and more dealings with the perps who seemed to get nastier than the last.

 

There were fewer laughs at the end of each day, both of them calling it a night when the hands of the office clock pointed to the witching hour. They used to stop at the bar by the corner for a nightcap but the long hours together combined with their foul moods made for poor company.

 

After one particular brutal conclusion to a case, they stood outside the bar; both silently debating if even a drink could bring some type of solace. Cullen remembered the look Raleigh gave him and was still to this day surprised at how in spite the endless waves of heartache, disappointment in the job and bitterness between them, Raleigh agreed that it was a bad idea.

 

Without a word, he nodded, had tucked his hands into his jacket and walked away.

 

They still had moments where they forgot the soul crushing aspect of their jobs. They had worked so hard to get to where they are now, believing that they could make a difference. It was just getting harder by the day to not become as jaded as his partner.

 

They still had their moments of peaceful quiet and snorting at each other’s snarky comments.

 

Cullen sharply tilted his head to the side and groaned when a satisfying _pop_ eased some of the tension building up his neck. He was looking forward to leaving the office and hitting the road to his sister’s house. He hadn’t been able to make it for the festivities the previous year and Mia made him swear to make an effort, at least for the sake of his nieces and nephews.

 

The report wasn’t going to write itself, so he doubled down and typed faster.

 

“Cullen,” Raleigh called, “we’ve got a problem.”

 

“Oh?” he replied, not even looking up from his report.

 

“Yeah, and it’s your mess.”

 

Cullen huffed, looking up from his laptop to narrow his eyes at Raleigh who stood to the side of the doorway. One of Raleigh’s arms was pulling on something, his face full of wicked mirth. Cullen didn’t like this one bit. He had promised Mia that he’d leave as soon as he could.

 

“And how is it my mess?”

 

“I’m glad you asked,” his partner was in a significantly good mood compared to earlier. With both hands he yanked what sounded like chains and before Cullen could say anything, he saw that Raleigh wasn’t hiding something but some _one_.

 

“It’s a Satinalia miracle, Rutherford!” Raleigh crowed.

 

Arms outstretched, he pushed the handcuffed woman into the shared office space.

 

Except it wasn’t any woman.

 

This was _the_ woman.

 

He’ll never forget her name. _Kaeran Lavellan_.

 

The very same woman who had cut his face open and left him with the scar on his lip.

 

“Raleigh,” he huffed, “just put her in a holding cell.”

 

“Can’t,” his partner fought back a grin, clearly amused.

 

“Did you forget the protocol when it comes to apprehending suspects? There’s a key…”

 

“Did you forget how many are in the holding cells?”

 

“Surely not all of them are full?” He huffed.

 

“Cullen, are you forgetting what time of year this is? One of _the_ most wonderful times of the year unless you’re in law enforcement, then it’s an absolute nightmare,” Raleigh chuckled.

 

“Can I get my phone call?” Kaeran sighed.

 

“You’ll get your call as soon as we sort this,” Raleigh replied dismissively.

 

“Pretty sure this is against my rights,” she grumbled.

 

“You know what? Cullen, forget it, I’ll just put her in one of the less crowded ones.”

 

Raleigh went to grab her when Cullen called out, “Wait. Raleigh, you can’t do that. Are there any cells that have women in them?”

 

“No.”

 

Cullen swore under his breath, feeling the tension flare up once more. This was a problem.

 

“What’s she in for, anyway?”

 

“Ah, I see what you’re going for, but that’s not going to work. Can’t give her the slap on the wrist and off you go. She got caught crossing the border with contraband.”

 

“What kind of contraband?”

 

“I’m so glad you asked that question,” Raleigh went out to retrieve something and returned with an evidence bag filled with guns. Cullen spied two glocks among the rest. Pinching the bridge of his nose, he tried to will away the headache that was bound to arrive.

 

Glancing up at Kaeran, she splayed out her hands slightly and gave him an apologetic look as if to say, _ya caught me, my bad_.

 

“Raleigh, can’t you…”

 

“Afraid not, Culls,” he said, putting on his coat and making a show of his sweet, imminent exit. “Unlike you, I work the next three days while you have your family bonding time. And as it turns out,” he pointed to the clock, small hand on the five, “it is officially the end of my shift until the morning. Looks like you’ve got your hands full with now _two_ reports and possibly some phone calls to make. So, good luck in finding someplace to transfer this one and don't forget to send my love to your sister.”

 

“My sister hates you, you know,” Cullen called out.

 

Kaeran waited until Raleigh was far enough before leaning forward, resting her hip against Cullen’s desk. She heard Cullen mutter something about someone named Mia who was going to kill him.

 

“So, about that phone call?” She thought that tacking on an encouraging smile would help.

 

Her smile immediately faltered when the Mountie looked up and glowered.


	2. Satinalia Eve (part ii)

He can’t believe he’s doing this and _maybe just maybe_ if he doesn’t think about it too deep, his heart won’t seize and kill him over the thought that he might lose his job over this. 

He can deal with getting demoted, but having to clear his desk and find a new vocation brings dread to his heart and soul. He had always dreamed of serving his country, had toiled and trained hard at the academy. He couldn’t very well throw his career away over something as foolish as this.

Maker, Mia was going to kill him if he didn’t make it tonight.

She would kill him if she ever found out that he brought along work and an assassin under her roof. 

He stood no chance. Mia was going to kill him regardless.

Hopefully he would be able to transfer Kaeran elsewhere before it came to that.

He was lucky enough to be able to step out of the precinct with his prisoner in tow and raise no suspicion.  

 

This was bad. He should’ve just called Mia and braced for her disappointed tone. He could have waited until Raleigh returned the next morning and have him deal with it.

Cullen didn’t need to think about it. It would’ve been unwise to leave Kaeran in his partner’s less compassionate hands.

Why, just why did he have to go and risk his career for her? Her of all people.

 

Between him and Raleigh, Cullen thought he was the logical one. Apparently not. Maybe he needed a change of partners? For a moment he fretted over exactly how much of Samson was rubbing off on him. Eh, better not think too hard about the infuriating man. He still had a bone to pick with him. Next time. If he had enough time before he had to clear his things from his desk.

Maker, what a mess.

He glanced at the clock. He had enough time to double check he had all he needed for the brief holiday and pick  up food for the long drive. He also had to meet with Kaeran’s lawyer to pick up paperwork and go over the details of her transfer. Andraste willing, he’d be able to drop her at the nearest precinct, make her some other poor officer’s problem and still make it with a few hours left of Satinalia eve.

 

He motioned for Kaeran to follow him out of his apartment; he had been uneasy about bringing her in to his private space but the alternative was out of the question. Even if he had left her handcuffed in his car there was the chance that she could worm her way out of the confines and possibly steal his car. He wasn’t taking any chances with her.

“So where are we meeting your lawyer?”

“She’ll get in contact. She’s used to my shenanigans,” she replied, smirking.

“If you call smuggling firearms ‘shenanigans’, I’d hate to know what you call your other less savoury activities." 

“Mostly shenanigans.”

“Right.”

“I consider our first meet as shenanigans.”

 

He sighed, throwing his duffel bag in the trunk and opening the passenger door for her to get in. “You came at me with a knife.”

“Shenanigans.” She chirped back happily.

Cullen leaned forward to help her with the seatbelt. He looked up at her and pointed at his lip. “You nearly cut my face open and gave me this scar.”

“Hey! That’s how we met. I consider it special.”

Cullen huffed, straightening himself before slamming the door shut and walking to the driver’s side.

 

Once they hit the road, he glanced at his phone. No word from Mia. A small miracle. 

“I need your word that until we get this all sorted that there won’t be any games. No shenanigans.” He added pointedly.

Kaeran blew a raspberry and slouched in her seat, obviously put out.

“So how do we get contact?”

 

No sooner he said that did he hear a vibrate. He glanced at his phone but there was no notification.

Whatever it was, it kept on buzzing.

Kaeran giggled.

“I might need you to pull over,” she said sheepishly.

His brows furrowed.

“What did I say about—?”

“Okay but this was BEFORE you said anything about shenani—gaaah!!” Another buzz.

 

Cullen pulled over, a mixture of a scowl and confusion on his face.

“What in the Maker is going on??”

“I need you to do something just don’t freak out.” His eyes widened. “I said don’t freak out!!” She had the audacity to admonish him. A perp was admonishing him, an officer of the Royal Ferelden Mounted Police. Unbelievable.

She eyed her chest before looking at him. The whole time the buzzing continued. It took Cullen a few seconds to realize.

“Did you...shove a phone in your...” he motioned to her chest.

 

He mentally willed himself to not blush. This couldn’t be happening...

“Look, I don’t know how much longer it’s going to ring and I won’t say anything to anyone, promise. Just...grab it, my boobs can’t take it,” she practically whined.

 

Cullen had enough sense to pull over, puffing out his cheeks before gingerly leaning over to reach for the phone in the...confines of her shirt. Kaeran jolted slightly at the contact, tittering over the flustered look on the Mountie’s face.

“How did Samson not find this? Didn’t he search you?”

 

She bit back a grin, refusing to answer. 

Huffing, he managed to free the mobile and answered, hitting the speaker button.

“This is Constable Rutherford from the Royal Ferelden Mounted Police,  you are on speaker phone, may I ask to whom I am speaking to?”

Kaeran rolled her eyes at him for such formality.

He worried that they either lost the connection or that the contact was spooked.

 

Finally.

 

“Yeah, uh, is my client with you?”

“Your client?”

“This is her lawyer speaking, is my client presently with you?”

“Hiya Rhona,” Kaeran chimed in, leaning closer to the phone.

“Hey dumbass, did I hear right from your voicemail that you got busted for illegal possession of firearms?”

 

Cullen choked. What kind of lawyer called their client out like that? Whoever it was, they were familiar with Kaeran’s work.

“Rhona’s my cousin,” she added for Cullen’s benefit.

Ah, that clarified things.

“Well someone had to get a law degree to save your ass.”

“Don’t worry, she’s a good lawyer, also my conscience. She’s talked me out of some stupid stuff,” Kaeran said to Cullen warmly.

“Too bad you didn’t think to call me before this stunt. You do realize it’s the holidays, right? Offices aren’t open for the next few days.”

“Aw, come on, Rhony dear, you always move mountains for me.”

“Yeah, yeah. I’ve got the paperwork. So where do we meet?”

 

Kaeran looked at Cullen, brows raised. The Mountie took over the conversation and they agreed to meet at a gas station on the way to South Reach. They needed to tank up and grab snacks for the trip anyway.

About an hour in to the drive, they find the appointed gas station and while waiting for Rhona to show up, Cullen escorts Kaeran into the washroom.

 

“You know, if you crowd me any closer people are going to think we’re going to the bathroom to have sex,” she teased.

Cullen rolled his eyes.

“Better make it quick then,” he replied, locking the door for good measure.

He cursed under his breath a moment later while Kaeran cackled.

He pulled out the key to unlock the handcuffs before digging into his duffle bag and stashing both items in a zippered compartment.

“Finally,” she sighed, happy to regain mobility of her hands.

“Don’t thank me yet.”

“W-why?” she cocked her head at him before realizing he was handing her something.

She bristled when she realized what it was.

“Oh, fuck that! Nuh-uh.”

“Until we know what the next step is, I’m not taking any chances.”

 

He bent down to strap the ankle monitor just above the cuff of her short boot, ensuring that it was properly fastened and functioning.

“Satisfied?”

As Cullen straightened himself and assessed her, taking in her stern expression and tightly crossed arms.

“For now, but I won’t rest until we get you sorted.”

 

They both exited the bathroom and noticed a new car was parked next to Cullen’s. The elvhen woman waved at them and Cullen cautiously approached with Kaeran walking ahead of him. If the woman wasn’t alone, he couldn’t tell based on the vacant parking area. The neon lights of the gas station flickered momentarily before resettling. He tried not to think of it as a possible omen.

Whatever reservations he had about the woman vanished when he saw the two women embrace; Rhona was taller than Kaeran and the pinched look on her face smoothed with relief upon seeing her cousin. Kaeran had mentioned that they were cousins but he couldn’t see any similarities between the two; Kaeran’s pale skin glowed under the moonlight, nearly blanketing over her freckles and made her hair nearly white, while Rhona was darker by several shades and the neon sign above their heads further accented her red tresses.

“I can’t believe you got busted with contrabands, _again_ ,” Rhona huffed.

“You know, if you keep complaining, I can find another lawyer,” her cousin teased.

“Please! Who would take you?” 

“I’m sure someone would—”

“Don’t make me laugh! Not even the morally bankrupt ones want to deal with you.”

“Ouch, that stings.”

“Serves you right, pulling me out from my humble abode and out in the cold to deal with your latest stunt.”

“I told you, I meant it. No more shenanigans.” 

“And purposely getting caught crossing the border with illegal firearms was your best plan?”

“Certainly the least bloody,” Kaeran shrugged.

 

“I’m sorry, but what exactly is going on? You’re here to give me the transfer documents and assisting me in delivering your cousin to the nearest precinct for charges of smuggling illegal weapons across country lines, correct?”

Rhona seemed confused, glanced at Kaeran before answering.

“Who said anything about a transfer? My client is offering herself as a witness to an ongoing investigation. She’s seeking protection until the suits come get her.”

 

Cullen blinked. This wasn’t the plan. He was getting mixed feelings about this development.

“So to whom do I bring her to then?”

 

Rhona narrowed her eyes, her patience thinning. He wasn’t sure with the neon lighting in the background, but he could have sworn that they glinted back like shimmering icicles.

“I don’t think you’re reading the situation right. _You’re_ the protection. You have to keep her alive and safe until the organized crime department come get her.”

 

Oh Maker no, this wasn’t possible.

His stomach dropped. From the moment that Kaeran set foot into his shared office space it felt like he was dangling from the precipice and staring into the void, willing himself to hang on for dear life.

His mind racing, he forgot that he was on solid ground.

 

This startling revelation was the opposite of succour. And he felt very much as though he were freefalling into oblivion.

“Surprise! Are you surprised, Cullen? We get to spend Satinalia together! Isn’t it great?”

He was lost.

 

Lost, and an absolute dead man.

 

Mia was going to kill him.


End file.
